Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Man, jail baloney is awful.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
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