i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
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