I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I could make wine with my vomit
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Randomize
