am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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