Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
