Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Randomize
