IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize