why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
OH MY GOD I AM DYING. AS I WAS TEXTING I JUST BUMPED INTO A MOTHER FUCKING DEER. I AM SHAKING
Wait...Literally? You hit a deer...with your body?!
I PHYSICALLY RAN INTO IT. I FELT ITS WEIRD HAIR AND I EVEN APOLOGIZED CAUSE IT DINDT REGISTER THAT IT WASNT A PERSON. MORTIFIED.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
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