Already got asked if we're dating
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Randomize
