he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
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