Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Randomize
