..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize
