This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
