I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize