Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
