having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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