When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
