NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
