Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Just pee around me
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Randomize
