jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Randomize
