I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
