:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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