It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Randomize
