i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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