we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
