I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
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