i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
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