Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
