So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
