I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
You can't just leave with hair like that
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
