I need to stop coming to work sober
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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