On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
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