piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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