i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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