Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
They left me at home... I'm a liability
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
