i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
