dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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