ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
