i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
