we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
