we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
it's great music for shaving your balls
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
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