I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I enjoy the company of your penis
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
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