I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Randomize
