I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
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