i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize