do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
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