doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Randomize