OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
