We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
