VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
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